Seeing people getting married makes me feel good and it also keeps my hope alive that someday I will also be one of them. But sometimes, it does not seem to be as easy as it sounds. A friend of mine has landed himself in trouble by marrying his beloved.
Reason- the boy is a Muslim and the girl is a Hindu Brahmin. Both of them are on the run at present with the girl's family in hot pursuit. I pray the situation calms down soon.
They got married at an Arya Samaj mandir and the boy converted to Hinduism, just for the legalities. I was present at the wedding myself as a witness. How weddings are done at the mandir? Don't ask. A movie's trailer runs longer than a wedding at Arya Samaj mandir. In twenty minutes I witnessed three weddings excluding my friend's. The Pandit recited mantras while other gentlemen were busy doing the paper work. In five minutes it was done. They have a ready made turban and a Chunni both attached to each other just to ensure that they finish it fast without wasting time. The reason is most of the couples who go there are those who run away from home and get married secretly. The rest are those families who cannot afford the cost of a wedding and the mandir satisfies the both parties. The fire burns from morning till evening. When it comes to applying sindur, the pandit asks the bride- do you have to go home or to office? It is adjusted accordingly then. If the bride has to rush somewhere,for example- office, after the wedding, the sindur is applied only for the namesake which can easily be wiped out leaving no traces. If the pandit takes a little longer to finish, others start shouting-'Are panditji jaldi karo nahin to baithi party laut jayegi'. You can imagine how funny it was.
But there is something I can never forget. Someone is ready to risk their life and future for their beloved. It is not an ordinary thing. It exhibits a strong commitment and clarity of mind, if not in the long run, at present at least. Everyone is not lucky to find someone who is ready to die for them. It reminds me of the opening dialog of the movie Casino. Robert De Niro says' When you love someone, you got to trust them. There is no other way. You got to give them the key to everything that is yours. Otherwise what's the point?'
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Silence
Silence has always been beautiful to me. I love it. It is like the charger of a battery. You feel recharged when you come out of silence. Then you have something to say, something to share, something to contribute........May be.... like him...
Sunday, November 15, 2009
A move
Growing older brings new things leaving old ones behind with an exception of a few carried along and I feel it everyday. Looking behind makes me realize how much I have changed so far. The changes are manifold. The basic nature has not changed but has started to get solidified. I do not have the same vision I used have. I better say, I did not have any vision before. A blind man does not see anything, forget vision. Now, the eyes have started to open, although things look blur at the moment but it is beyond doubt that I can see the path. A character defining me seem to be emerging. Though not at full speed yet, the journey has begun and I am going wherever it takes me.
I clearly see the obstacles and I have no idea how I am going to handle them. Kali will figure some way out for me. I can feel it.
I clearly see the obstacles and I have no idea how I am going to handle them. Kali will figure some way out for me. I can feel it.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Days with Avinash
Sometimes I just sit and relax with my eyes closed and my mind takes me into flashback. Today I suddenly remembered my days with Avinash in Saffron Global which gave me the first so called white collar job of my life. His first impression was not good, not that he committed any crime but because his face gave an impression of a hooligan. It was only after he began to speak belying his looks that we got acquainted. He became interested in me when he learnt that both of us were of same caste and belonged to the same state. Slowly I also realised that it was only an error from the part of god that he got those looks otherwise he was a very lively person always entertaining people around him with his sense of humour.
On completion of training we got into the same team led my Mansi. She also was new and it was her first team. Avinash was a good salesman and soon he got attention of Mansi. She treated him well as he was the saviour for her team. But this good treatment led to creation of an illusion in his mind that Mansi liked him and he boasted of his good relations with Mansi quite often which landed him in a ridiculous situation one day.
That day Avinash sent me a vulgar but entertaining text which I found very funny. Being aware of his close friendship with Mansi I advised him to forward that text to her also for she would find it funny too. Hence, in the air emboldened with his illusion and my advise the message was delivered. And before he could receive the acknowledgement of delivery Mansi appeared before us furious as Kali shouting at him that how he dared send her a vulgar message. She was shouting at the top of her voice thrilling he whole floor. She also threatened to lodge a complaint against him. Avinash was numb. He froze for those moments.
It was both funny and embarrassing and I never realised that it might turn into an ugly situation like that. Avinash looked at Mansi with a comical look in his face like that of Tom of 'Tom and Jerry' cartoon show when he is faced with his angry owner. He started begging for forgiveness and attempted to defend himself by saying that he did not send the text himself, it was I who did it but to no avail. She did not listen to him as it was sent from his number.
Somehow the situation was pacified without any complaints against him only revealing the depth of the so called good relations.
On completion of training we got into the same team led my Mansi. She also was new and it was her first team. Avinash was a good salesman and soon he got attention of Mansi. She treated him well as he was the saviour for her team. But this good treatment led to creation of an illusion in his mind that Mansi liked him and he boasted of his good relations with Mansi quite often which landed him in a ridiculous situation one day.
That day Avinash sent me a vulgar but entertaining text which I found very funny. Being aware of his close friendship with Mansi I advised him to forward that text to her also for she would find it funny too. Hence, in the air emboldened with his illusion and my advise the message was delivered. And before he could receive the acknowledgement of delivery Mansi appeared before us furious as Kali shouting at him that how he dared send her a vulgar message. She was shouting at the top of her voice thrilling he whole floor. She also threatened to lodge a complaint against him. Avinash was numb. He froze for those moments.
It was both funny and embarrassing and I never realised that it might turn into an ugly situation like that. Avinash looked at Mansi with a comical look in his face like that of Tom of 'Tom and Jerry' cartoon show when he is faced with his angry owner. He started begging for forgiveness and attempted to defend himself by saying that he did not send the text himself, it was I who did it but to no avail. She did not listen to him as it was sent from his number.
Somehow the situation was pacified without any complaints against him only revealing the depth of the so called good relations.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Commitment
It has been more than two weeks since I wrote last. During these all days I had been thinking to write about something and I do not find a better thing than commitment. I have been trying to remain committed to something and everyday I fail. It is not as easy as it sounds. I found it to be the most difficult thing because once you say yes, you have to stick to it whether you like it or not.
Commitment is a big thing in life and those who are committed are really made of metal, some substance.
Commitment brings discipline which in turn leads to character. A man without character is not a man. He is nobody in fact. Commitment simply means- Walk like you talk. And when you start walking like you talk, you are not left with many things to talk about because you have to do what you talk and you cannot do everything. It makes you quiet and observant.
It reminds me of a story about a Chinese monk to whom a woman brought her child. The child was fond of eating sweets. The woman tried her best to forbid the child from eating so much sweets but he was not listening to her. The woman was worried for it might lead to damaging his teeth. So she brought him to the monk with a hope that the child would not disobey such a reverend person. When she told him the story the monk asked her to bring the child next week. She went to him the following week. But again he said ''not today, bring him next week''.
She went there with her son the next week but this time again she was asked by the monk to come the following week. The mother was puzzled but did not dare ask him anything. She went there again. This time the monk asked her to sit and took the child for a short walk around his garden. After sometime he came back and told the mother '' it's done. I have told him not eat sweets that much.''
The mother could not stop herself from asking him that why he took three weeks for such a small thing. The monk replied '' I was myself fond of sweets. How could I ask him not to eat if I could not live without it myself? It took me three weeks to leave it and that's why I kept on asking you to come back every week. Only today I felt I could ask him too to leave it.''
The monk was already regarded a great man by people and he could have easily asked the child without leaving his habit but he did not. The monk set an example of 'Walk like you talk'.
Commitment is a big thing in life and those who are committed are really made of metal, some substance.
Commitment brings discipline which in turn leads to character. A man without character is not a man. He is nobody in fact. Commitment simply means- Walk like you talk. And when you start walking like you talk, you are not left with many things to talk about because you have to do what you talk and you cannot do everything. It makes you quiet and observant.
It reminds me of a story about a Chinese monk to whom a woman brought her child. The child was fond of eating sweets. The woman tried her best to forbid the child from eating so much sweets but he was not listening to her. The woman was worried for it might lead to damaging his teeth. So she brought him to the monk with a hope that the child would not disobey such a reverend person. When she told him the story the monk asked her to bring the child next week. She went to him the following week. But again he said ''not today, bring him next week''.
She went there with her son the next week but this time again she was asked by the monk to come the following week. The mother was puzzled but did not dare ask him anything. She went there again. This time the monk asked her to sit and took the child for a short walk around his garden. After sometime he came back and told the mother '' it's done. I have told him not eat sweets that much.''
The mother could not stop herself from asking him that why he took three weeks for such a small thing. The monk replied '' I was myself fond of sweets. How could I ask him not to eat if I could not live without it myself? It took me three weeks to leave it and that's why I kept on asking you to come back every week. Only today I felt I could ask him too to leave it.''
The monk was already regarded a great man by people and he could have easily asked the child without leaving his habit but he did not. The monk set an example of 'Walk like you talk'.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Humiliation
Humiliation seems to be an integral part of life to me. I do not see any end to it. It does not matter where you are and what you are, you cannot escape it. Sometimes you are humiliated and sometime you humiliate others. Even great people like Gautam Buddha and Mahavira were humiliated many a times. Buddha made his living by begging and many times he was abused by people when he knocked their doors for alms. Sometimes people threw stones at him but he never left the door until he was given something. This is how determined he was. Humiliation did not bother him.
To me, humiliation means putting yourself above someone or others and making them feel small. Being at the receiving end always puts you at the risk of humiliation. This is the rule and there is no exception. You knock the door with a hope that you would be welcome. But it is not guaranteed. The door may open knocking your nose off. It is always risky. But it is how it is. You got to take the risk if you want to win.
Yes, it is disappointing, sometimes very much, when you are turned down but there is no other way except making preparations for a new attempt.
To me, humiliation means putting yourself above someone or others and making them feel small. Being at the receiving end always puts you at the risk of humiliation. This is the rule and there is no exception. You knock the door with a hope that you would be welcome. But it is not guaranteed. The door may open knocking your nose off. It is always risky. But it is how it is. You got to take the risk if you want to win.
Yes, it is disappointing, sometimes very much, when you are turned down but there is no other way except making preparations for a new attempt.
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